If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts, you don’t have to go through this alone. Most people who consider suicide struggle with underlying difficulties, such as depression, past or current trauma, or persistent stress, overwhelm, and hopelessness.
Some people feel that they are not accepted by others for any number of reasons, and others may feel that they are a burden to those that they love. Sometimes these thoughts may be fleeting, or they may come back again and again. Any which way, the PCC is here to help you find the change and hope you need to start building the life you want to live.
If you have taken action to end your life or are in other immediate danger call University Police at 845-257-2222 for on-campus support. If off-campus, please call 911 for emergency assistance.
If you are not in imminent danger, but are finding yourself preoccupied with uncontrollable suicidal thoughts or are having an increasing urge to cut or engage in other self-harming behavior, reach out to the PCC for crisis support at (845) 257-2920.
Weekday/daytime hours: Call the PCC at the number above or go directly to the PCC office in the Student Health and Counseling Center building (map). Students should inform the administrative assistant that they are experiencing a crisis and request a same-day appointment.
After hours or on weekends: Any student may contact the PCC’s "Emergency Contact for Student Consult" (ECSC) via phone.
On campus students may call the PCC directly and follow the automated prompts to reach our answering service – a PCC clinician will then return your call shortly. On campus students may also talk with their RA or RD for help accessing the ECSC.
Students living off campus should call the PCC office and follow the automated prompts to reach our answering service. Ask to be connected to the PCC "Emergency Contact for Student Consult" (ECSC); the answering service will in turn alert a PCC clinician and the student will receive a return call promptly.
When utilizing the answering service, please keep your phone near you, ensure that your phone is charged, and ensure that the PCC clinician can leave you a voicemail in the event that the call is missed. The phone number of the PCC clinician will appear as a blocked, private, or unknown number, so please also make sure your phone can receive these kinds of calls.
We understand suicidal thinking to be both an issue in and of itself, and a symptom of other concerns. A PCC clinician can help you find ways to reduce stress and triggers that increase these thoughts, work on finding the underlying causes, create a plan so you know how to keep yourself safe when these thoughts happen, and/or find additional supports and the right level of care for you to address these issues ongoingly.
Many people fear discussing suicidal thoughts for a number of reasons, especially including concern about how others will perceive them and feeling unsure about what will happen. However, giving yourself permission to share difficult thoughts and experiences (through getting professional help) early on, may actually prevent things from getting much worse later on. The PCC has many different services, including Crisis Intervention, to get you the help you need as soon as possible.
Suicide is rarely impulsive, and prior to acting on suicidal thoughts, many people provide clues through words or behaviors about their depressed state. These words or behaviors may be noticed by friends, roommates, faculty, and others.
These clues may include:
Talking about suicidal intentions, or threatening to kill oneself
Behaving recklessly, increasing use of alcohol and other substances
Creating artwork, music, stories, poems, or letters that focus on one's death
Suicidal talk, talk about death or afterlife, such as:
“How many pills do you think it would take to really knock someone out?”
“My family would be better off without me.”
“I don’t want to be a burden anymore.”
“I don't know how much longer I can take this.”
“I really don't care what happens.”
“I can’t stand this anymore. I’m going to end it all.”
“You won’t have to put up with me for much longer.”
“I’ll be dead before I’m twenty-five.”
Posting statements like the above on social media, or texting goodbyes
Planning for suicide, such as purchasing pills or "saving up" pills
Giving away possessions, especially valuable or special items
Behaviors like these are cause for concern, especially if they occur close to a significant change in someone’s life, such as death of a loved one, relationship breakup, failing academic performance, or problems with finances. If you observe a friend exhibiting these behaviors, please contact the PCC (or discuss what you know as soon as possible with your RA/RD if you live on campus).
Additional Red Flags That May Indicate Risk
Feeling down, blue, hopeless, trapped, burdensome to others
Feelings of worthlessness, guilt, shame, self-loathing
Changes in current functioning - eating, sleeping, attending classes, socializing
Family or friend loss or instability; significant problems with parents, partners, peers
Academic or job problems or failure
Social isolation, withdrawal from friends
Decreased interest in usual activities or physical appearance
Increased agitation and irritability
Impulsivity and risk-taking
Mental health diagnosis or having symptoms of a disorder, especially depression, that have not been formally diagnosed (possibly because the person has not previously been connected with treatment)
Physical illness; change in daily functioning abilities
Access to method for suicide, such as guns, pills, cutting instruments
Previous suicide attempts (this may be the strongest risk factor)
Sudden positive change in mood – people may appear happier as they begin planning their death
If you are concerned about someone who is in immediate danger, call University Police at 845-257-2222 for on-campus support. If off-campus, please call 911 for emergency assistance.
If the person is not in imminent danger of suicide, but you would like to speak to someone urgently for help in supporting this person, reach out to the PCC for crisis support at (845) 257-2920. See the top of this page for crisis service details.
If you know someone who might be showing warning signs of suicide, but you are unsure if they are actually thinking about ending their life, the below information is for you.
Worrying that someone may be suicidal can be scary on many levels, and many people feel stuck and nervous when it comes to talking about suicide. Most of us don’t have a lot of practice talking about serious concerns in a direct but compassionate manner, and it’s common think “What if I say the wrong thing?” But if you’re unsure whether or not someone is suicidal, the best thing to do is ask.
The good news is – studies have found that no one makes someone else suicidal by asking, or plants the idea in their head by showing that you care. In fact, giving a person considering suicide the opportunity to express their feelings can provide relief from loneliness and pent-up feelings, and may actually prevent a suicide attempt.
SUNY uses a resource called Question, Persuade, Refer (QPR)to address warning signs of possible suicide and connect people to professional help. Just like CPR, this is a basic way that anyone can take lifesaving measures, not just professionals. SUNY affiliates (students, faculty, staff, etc.) can take a free course on QPR - just click the link, scroll down to “QPR Training – Question, Persuade, Refer,” and follow the directions.
Below are some QPR-inspired ideas for how to begin and guide a conversation:
In preparation for your conversation with someone, remember that you may not be able to guarantee confidentiality, and you may have to talk with a professional if a life is at stake. If someone says “don’t tell anyone about this,” it’s ok to say “I won’t spread this far and wide, but I might have to talk to someone to get help in order to help you better.” It’s best to be transparent as much as possible.
Bring up anything concrete and specific that you’ve noticed that made you start to worry, and then ask the person directly if they are thinking about ending their life or dying.
Try to stay away from broad generalizations or judgements rather than facts. It’s easier for someone to deny things if you say “I’m worried about you because you seem off” vs. “I’m worried about you because you haven’t been in class lately and don’t come to the dining hall with us anymore.”
It’s best to ask directly, and ok to use phrases like “Have you been thinking about killing yourself?” or “Are you thinking about ending your life?”
You can add some context by saying something like “I know sometimes in these kinds of situations people start to think about suicide – is that happening for you?” or “This sounds like it’s really affecting you, and it’s just making me concerned – are you thinking about dying or killing yourself?” or “I know this can be awkward to talk about, but I’m worried. Are you thinking about suicide?”
Again, stay away from broad generalizations, like asking “Are you unsafe?” as this can mean a lot of different things to different people. Same with “Are you thinking of hurting yourself?” A person in this state may think of suicide as an escape or relief rather than a means of harm, so clarifying if you mean suicide or self-injury can be helpful.
Try to ask open-ended questions and follow up questions – it’s not up to you to determine if they’re safe right now or how to treat them, just try to make a connection and demonstrate that you’re open and interested.
Listen, connect, and emphasize that it’s important to get help. Try to help the person shift from feeling hopeless to being open to resources and services.
Validate and accept the person’s feelings and distress, without condoning suicide as the solution. Offer alternatives and work together to try to find other pathways they haven’t yet explored.
Help the person identify their strengths, let them know that you care and they are important to you.
Sometimes when we express concern, people don’t want to or are not ready to accept our help. If they say no when you offer help it could mean a few things:
They may not believe there is a problem
They may be worried that facing the problem will make it worse
They may be concerned about other consequences
They feel threatened or judged
They are comfortable opening up to you about the problem but might not want to repeat themselves or have a hard time trusting others
Work with them to help shift their perspective, and try to address their concerns while also staying firm in your recommendation.
Try to avoid arguing with the person, telling them that suicide is wrong, and giving too much advice. You want to position yourself alongside the person so that they can steer in another direction, rather than being in opposition to them.
Make the “referral” - connect the person to a professional who can help. If possible, help them take action on this by calling or going to the PCC together.
If the person already has a therapist and feels more comfortable talking with them, that’s ok too. Let them know that the PCC can be there to help if they can’t get in contact with their current provider. Medical professionals and family members can help too.
Support them in their willingness to explore help. You can say things like:
“I’m worried about the burdensome feelings you are describing; let’s call the Counseling Center to talk. I’ll stay with you while you call, and we can walk over together if you need to go in person.”
“It is late at night, but I know how to reach the Emergency Contact Counselor. We can also contact our RD to help us make the connection. Let’s make the call together.”
Tell them you will keep in touch about your concerns and that you will keep the lines of communication open, checking in regularly.
And last, take care of yourself as well! You are also eligible for support from the PCC if you are struggling with supporting someone.
Suicide is the second leading cause of death among college students (after accidental injury) (1)
About one out of every 24 suicide attempts ends in death (2)
60-80% of all people who completed suicides had made prior communication (from hints to threats). (3)
Students who face discrimination are at higher risk for suicidal thoughts and behaviors. (1)
In a 2022 survey, 30% of LBGTQ+ college students said they had thoughts of suicide in the past year – almost double the rate for heterosexual students.
Pacific Islander, Native American, and Black students have reported higher rates of attempted suicide than students of other races.
Though cis women appear to attempt suicide more often, cis men are more likely to complete suicide. Stigma and men’s lower likelihood to report to healthcare systems are likely factors in this difference. (3)
There are many things that can be protective factors against suicide. Feeling connected to one's school, decreasing stigma around talking about suicide, being able to access mental health care, and a trusting relationship with at least one adult can be important in terms of suicide prevention.
